Monday, November 5, 2012

Mommyhood

Yes, that is spit-up in front of her
3:24 AM  Through tears of my own I plead "Sweet girl, why won't you stop crying?"
4:00 AM Dad picks her up and walks her around and gets her to sleep.
6:30 AM After two hours of sleep she starts stirring and wakes up again, looks at me and gives me a big smile...cue the water works.


     I feel like this scenario adequately describes parenthood.  Perseverance, teamwork and reward. Going into it, I knew being a mommy would be different than I had expected. 
I knew it would change me. 
I knew it would be hard. 
I knew it would be rewarding. 

     I also knew that finding a balance would be a challenge, and let me tell you, it has been!  Lucky for me, Nick is super patient. He's basically a saint (yes, Santa Claus music would be appropriate right now. [sorry, lame joke])  

     Before Snuffy was born, I gave myself six weeks postpartum to "loose myself." To not worry too much about the house, to not worry too much about what I ate and to just get used to being mom.  Well, she's seven weeks old now. The house seems worse than a week ago, I definitely had chocolate dunkers and a giant soda last night, and my hair needs to be done but my hairbrush seems to have run away. But it's all okay.

     I love how she looks just like her daddy but with my eyes. Also like Nick, she's easy going and fairly relaxed with whatever our schedule throws at us and like me she craves constant contact; even in her sleep she'll reach a hand out to lay on my cheek or lean her head forward until she's touching my arm.  And I feel like if I worried too much about the house or what I looked like at all times I'd miss these things.  

     Balance. I must find it, and I know I will. It may clearly will take longer than six weeks, but in the mean time, I'm going to keep enjoying my little girl. I know I'll be sad if I didn't...and I'll probably go put away some dishes while she sleeps. :-)