Fits of Ikea

As mentioned before, Nick and I have decided to stay put where we are and not move. Therefore, we have a lot that needs to be done in our house to make it work. Where is quite possibly the best place for getting ideas to make a small place work? IKEA!
     This last week Nick had a Sunday-Monday off, so naturally we did what was best and went when everyone else would be going...on Sunday. Why I thought this was a great idea, I'll never know. I don't like crowds in general, sometimes they freak me out and I feel like I have to leave RIGHT NOW! and I feel like, as a whole, people just forget common sense and courtesy and any sense of traffic and direction when they get to Ikea.  Multiply all of this by  infinity when this pregnant chick gets hungry.
     I can say I made an honest effort. We had a leisurely morning; slept in, made breakfast, watched an episode of '24,' you know, the usual. We had kinda talked about going so we showered, got dressed and left. As we were leaving I had a faint undertone of warning in my head that maybe I should eat something, just as a precaution. I quickly stomped out that little voice and took attitude with myself that I would be just fine...I'd just had breakfast.
     I didn't feel hungry at all, but in reality, that breakfast had been about two hours prior. Now, if I don't eat every two to three hours, I think I've mentioned before how I turn in to psycho-pregnant-lady-who-will-kill-you-just-for-making-a-joke. We pulled into the parking lot and thought "Crap! Bad idea to come on a Sunday!" Oh well, we'll make the best of it and really my mind frame was that I would just relax, enjoy myself and do the pregnant stroll through everything (Nick had been warned this would be the case.)
     My amazing husband found one of the best parking spots available, only four spaces from the door! We walk in and I grab a yellow bag (despite grabbing our blue one at home and washing it off, we still forgot it!) Nick questions me and says "We NEVER use one of those upstairs." Cue flash anger and defenses. "Are you kidding me?!? We ALWAYS do! For candles, or light bulbs are random little stuff we see upstairs!" Note: That has really only happened approx. three times, but it seemed like it was a good idea to have. Like most good husband, he drops it and lets me carry the bag around.  We get maybe ten feet and he tries to hold my hand. Naturally it's the side of my body that the giant bag is slung around and I exasperatingly and loosely intertwine my fingers with his. This last MAYBE five seconds before I let go and, with all the outward frustration I can contain, switch the bag to the opposite shoulder.  He goes to grab my hand again and I semi-roll my eyes like "What are you doing?!?" He calmly (mostly) explains he's just trying to hold his wife's hand, isn't that alright? Ugg, fine.  
     My favorite part about going through Ikea is to look at all the rooms and how they have put them together and to imagine my own house looking that wide-open and beautiful. Poor Nick happened to be on my left and it was difficult for me to look, especially since he more enjoys the gadgets and actual merchandise downstairs.  I was trying to speed up, slow down, crane my neck around to see something just as we passed it. But it was not working. On top of it all, the hoards of other people around found it appropriate to come to a dead stop right in front of us, wait until we were right next to them to start walking with their giant full cart (which still confuses me, we're still in the first showcase, how is your cart so full???) or speed walk right behind us trying, quite unsuccessfully, to pass two groups of people. I got annoyed with the yellow bag that I so stubbornly was carrying and tried to shove it into the side of one of the couches. I'm sure I looked like a small child throwing a fit. So I angrily looked and found a bag holder I could toss it in to.
     At this point we're about halfway through the first showcase and Nick leans in to tell me that, whenever I'm ready, just let him and know and we can stop and get some food. Insert wave of emotions with an internal monologue of  "What? You think I need a reminder that we need food?  Are you saying I clearly need something because you can see waves or seething red radiating out of my body? Oh my gosh, I feel horrible for thinking this way towards my husband! He loves me so much and is just trying to help! Or wait, maybe he needs food and is getting grumpy? No, it's definitely me. Gosh, who am I? Why do I get like this so bad?!? It's like one minute I'm fine and perfectly happy and the next minute I'm as bad as those reality tv girls with horrible attitudes." Insert tears of guilt.
     I'm sure Nick saw all of that play out on my face and his response is just a sweet "Honey, would you like to go get us a table and sit down while I grab the food for us?" I still tear up when I think of the everlasting patience he has had with me through this whole process. He brings me the most delicious plate of Swedish meatballs, incredible lingonberry sauce and gravy. (side note: we learned you can get steamed veggies instead of mashed potatoes, we will definitely substitute next time, because I don't really like their mashed taters.) I had sat there waiting for him with tears streaming down my face but had recovered by the time he sat down. I'm sure the other people sitting around were a combination of concerned, annoyed and oblivious. 
     I apologized for how I acted, said I felt like he was blocking my view of the rooms and that is my favorite part and I felt like he was just trying to hurry us a long when all I really wanted was some time to get inspired for our house.  He laughed at me and reassured me that he wasn't trying to do any of that and that we could start over from the beginning, with me closest to the rooms so if I wanted to stop I could.  I swear, his amazingness and love never stops! 
     We were able to continue on with our trip, have fun, laugh and smile and get some great ideas for the house with a renewed sense that we made the right decision that it will all work out just fine. People were still dumb, but our minds were working together and we navigated the crowds without incident and made it through.  Karyanna is so lucky to have Nick as her Daddy! And I am so lucky to have him as an example of how we work in this family!

The Joy of Pregnancy?

To say I've been emotional lately is quite the understatement. But, I had my first potentially humiliating experience today.

I had been out shopping for an hour or two and was at Old Navy looking to score a new cute scarf for the Bachelorette dinner I'm going to this evening. I stopped by the maternity section (as per usual) and was (as per usual) bored with their selection. I then roamed the rest of the store (twice!) and found a total of 4 scarves. Really Old Navy?!? Anyway, I stopped to peruse the jewelry (note: I am SO HAPPY that mint green is totally in!) and while I was spinning a pillar I sneezed.

Now, mind you my ordinary sneezes have been described as dainty and even by some as classy. And although this was no normal-for-me sneeze, it was by no means big. But sneeze away I went and all of the sudden, oops! I just peed myself. And not a little either. (Damn you kegels!) This wasn't some little drip, drip, drop. This was full on baseball sized wet spot on the front of my jeans!

Unfortunately, I've gotten used to peeing myself when I had morning sickness. But that was in the privacy of my own bathroom and only conveyed through story telling to my friends. It's never actually happened in public.

Thank GOD I had a small bag from Ulta so as I rushed out the door, past the caped employee (no exaggeration there!) across the 'street' and to my car I was able to try (<--operative word!) to cover myself. I'm sure I was a million shades of red, walking too fast to be nonchalant and shaking my head the whole time. Not much can humble you like peeing your pants in public! I was praying the whole 5 block drive home that it wouldn't get on my seats (luckily it did not.)

And the crazy thing was when I came inside and sat down on the toilet to 'finish,' I hardly went at all. I didn't even feel like I had to go BEFORE I sneezed. Dear Sweet Baby Roth, mommy loves you! But please don't make me pee in public anymore. I don't want to do that much laundry!

Unexpected

I expected a lot of things about pregnancy. I expected to love it. I expected to be sick. I expected to want maternity clothes ASAP (full panel pants?!? YES PLEASE!) I expected that there would be hard days. I expected there would be incredible days. I expected there would be negative things, and I was not naive to the whole process (I do have 5 nieces and nephews ages 5 and under, 11 under 10 if you consider extended family!) I'm not a stranger to what all the books and websites say. I felt like I was prepared.

What I wasn't expecting, and really feel like I never heard (or maybe I did and just couldn't understand,) was all of the sorta bad stuff. Like the fact that my skin, although 10 times clearer and smoother, would stop obeying me when applying make up. I have changed my foundation twice now trying to find the right one for my new glorious, pre-pubescent skin. I think I may have settled on mineral make up (a MAJOR no for me before.)

Although I was expecting pain, I was more thinking along the lines of low back pain, or round ligament pain, and probably boob pain too. I was not expecting for all my major joints to feel like I've gained 50 lbs, not lost 15! I was not expecting old injuries to flare up out of nowhere and cause pain (I'm talking to you, hurt knee from 7th grade!)

I was certainly not expecting body changes. Ok well, clearly I was (duh! there's a human growing inside of me.) But I really more imagined it (read: fantasized it to be) an all of the sudden thing. I knew my body would change (hips widen, boobs pornify, belly protrude,) but I honestly thought it would all happen over night (silly Jessica!) I didn't expect this slow gradual change from the former me to the full on pregnant me. I didn't expect to ever look frumpy in maternity clothes (they fit my boobs but not my belly, a true shocker to me!)

I did expect the emo part though. Mostly because my PMS emotions are as up and down as a ride on Tower of Terror. However, they still shock me when they hit hard (why am I crying right now? Why am I going postal on that driver?!?)

I'm truly not complaining and I'm real sorry if it sounds like that (thanks Michelle and Linds for listening to me talk about some of this earlier!) I mainly just wanted to document what was going on so I have a heads up for next time (looking out for future-pregnant-Jessica :-D)

And I definitely feel so blessed with this pregnancy. I have several friends that are or have been preggers too and have it much worse than me! This has, so far, been an easy pregnancy. Praying it stays that way!